Monday, August 3, 2009

H2 Oh No!

We can live without hot water, right? I mean, running hot water is a pretty modern invention in the scheme of things, and people have lived without it before so we could conceivably do it again, right? Warm showers are really for namby pamby spoiled brats, right? Oh, yeah. I am a namby pamby spoiled brat...

I need a new water heater. Ours is only 8 years old, but its the victim of old pipes and owners (meaning me and Rob) who had no idea that it needed regular maintenance, and now its dead. We killed it with our neglect. Coincidentally, we are getting our old pipes replaced on Friday, like semi responsible home owners, and now we need a new water heater to go with them.

You know what the real pisser is? Besides the fact that all this plumbing is throwing a wrench into my plans for a new sofa? I don't even like to shower. Personal hygiene is so boring. I find the whole showering, leg shaving, armpit scrubbing, hair conditioning BS a boring, boring chore. Then you add the lotion and the blow drying, and its all I can do to stay awake. I would be so happy if I could get away with showering once a week or less, but unless I'm willing to move deep into the woods and eschew all laws, I don't think I could get away with that. I actually caught one of the mothers in Leila's class staring in what appeared to be disbelief at the tired pedicure on my toe nails. The nail polish was already gone on half of the nails, and what was left on the rest was a sliver of pink leftover from the pedicure I'd had four months before. Then, when I got them re done, she commented like she was patting me on the head. If it weren't for the back issues of People magazine piled next to the pedicure chair, I'd never go. Bo-ring. Some people find facials and stuff like that relaxing. I do not. Give me Sex and the City reruns any day.

I'm trying to look on the bright side of spending more than my sofa savings on new pipes and a water heater: I will have enough water pressure to rinse my hair, so my showers will be shorter. I will no longer have episodes of freezing water during a shower. The sprayer on my kitchen faucet will have enough power to do a good rinse job on dishes. I wont have to worry about plumbing for many many years. Really? That's it?


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