Monday, June 18, 2012

I Hate when I'm a Moron

I got a little to big for my ice cream britches today.  This is not a reference to my weight, although I can see how you would think that.

Today was Father's Day.  My Dad's favorite ice cream is Hagen Daz Dulce de Leche.  I decided that as a Father's Day treat, I would make him home-made dulce de leche ice cream.  It starts with home-made vanilla ice cream which I make with a whole vanilla bean, six egg yolks, the works.  Its not difficult, and I've made it successfully before, but there are a lot of little steps, and you have to pay attention.  The other part was making the dulce de leche, which sounds impressive enough that I probably shouldn't tell you that it is deceptively easy.  I used David Lebovitz's recipe, and the ingredient list goes like this: sweetened condensed milk.  Done.  The hardest part was getting the roasting pan down from behind all the crap in a high cabinet for the bain marie.  Do I sound like Martha Stewart right now, or what?

Everything was going fine, I felt really on my game.  The ice cream was churning, and it looked so good, so I tasted it. It was off.  Suddenly I realized I forgot to add the sugar in step one.  What a moron!  So I poured some of the dulce de leche (which came out perfectly) into the ice cream maker to see if that would sweeten the ice cream sufficiently, but all it did was melt the ice cream, and then freeze the dulce de leche into little, hard chunks.

I had to shitcan the whole thing.  I hate when I make mistakes like that.  It is necessary to have a sense of humor when stuff like this happens, but it took me a while to find it.  In fact, I'm still pissed off.  I spend the whole morning on this bullshit.

I didn't have anything else for dessert (except for an apple pie I made yesterday, which is a whole other story) So I asked Leila to call her Uncle and ask him to pick up some Hagen Daz for our dad.  Leila's message went like this, "Mom forgot to put sugar in the dulce de leche ice cream, so could you pick up some on your way?"  This made complete sense to me, but my brother brought a big-ole bag of sugar instead of ice cream.

Luckily, I don't feel the need to impress my family too much.  I did make mojitos which were awesome, but the salad had too much goat cheese.  I'm not happy unless people ooh and aah over my food.

So, that was today.  Tomorrow, I'm going to use the leftover piece of steak for a Thai steak salad thing.  Or maybe I've spent enough of my precious time in my kitchen and I will not step foot in that place.
The finished dulce, when life was still good, and nothing had gone to shit yet.

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