Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Level Two

There is a zen proverb that says "After enlightenment, the laundry." and that is where we are today, my friends. After all the wonderfulness of Christmas and New Years and Leila's Birthday, I'm on my third load, the dishes are done, the shopping was done yesterday, I have dinner planned for the next three days, the credit card bills are being paid by the skin of our teeth, the PTA board is in full swing, and winter recess is very very OVER.

It has been a lot of work getting this house back to the base level and, frankly, our base level is not that impressive. If the laundry is mostly done, the dishes are done, the house is picked up, clothes are put away, the floor is swept and there is food in the house for people and animals, that is the base level. It doesn't sound too terrible, but if you look closer you'll see that the wood blinds are disgusting, the kitchen floor is disgusting, the carpets haven't been vacuumed in months, and lets not even talk about those haunting shower tiles. So, I have decided that I will make a list of these level two house chores, limiting the list to five, and do one of them every day for a week. I will start this next week (along with my diet and my work out regimen. Right!) and I will get this place to a level where I can feel at least a little bit prouder than I do right now. My mother will still find all kinds of things for me to clean (what about the base boards? What about the front porch? What about your car? What about the chimney?) but she will just have to can it. She was a very good housekeeper. She is still 1000 times better than me even though she thinks she has gotten lazy. She's the kind of person that says on a Saturday morning, "Its 9:30 and I'm still my robe reading the paper! This is awful!" and I'm thinking, you're 71 years old and semi retired; what on earth do you need to get to that is so damn important? I think laziness is an art form, and I have almost perfected it. So, stay tuned next week to see if I actually follow through. Its as much a mystery to me as it is to you.

Hold on, I have to put in the fourth load... Okay, I'm back

I kicked off my personal challenge with a little project, a little launch party of my own, if you will. When the first load was in, I decided to detail the washer and dryer. You know how all the lint and the moisture just makes for gunk in all the knobs and crevices, and the detergent dispenser gets nasty? Well, add to that that one of the bottles of detergent that sits on top of the dryer (the machines are stacked) either leaked or seeped and there was liquid detergent all over the top of the dryer, meaning that it was also on everything else that is stored on top of there, and had dripped down and around, and had combined with the lint and the moisture to form extra gunk, and most of it had accumulated in the leak-pan that the machines sit in. So I took a rag and some 409 and started cleaning it all. I took a flat head screw driver and wrapped the rag around it and cleaned all the little spaces, and wiped every thing down, and cleaned the bottoms of all the detergent bottles and what ever else is up there, and it is a thing of beauty. It took three rags, actually, but I think my washer and dryer are really happy and pleased with themselves. They seem perkier.

I am now going to pick up the kid and take her to the bike shop to exchange her new helmet, and then to the hardware store to look for a composter. Then I will come home and rest because two to three hours of work a day is plenty.

Speaking of the child, Leila is participating in the schools spellathon, so if you any of you would like to sponsor her, minimum ten cents for every word spelled correctly, or a flat amount (no maximum) let me know how to reach you in the comments section. (I'll delete your personal information from the comments.) The winning class gets an ice cream party!

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