Monday, September 22, 2008

     There are so many fascinating things to write about today, I hardly know where to start!  Should I continue to bore you with my efforts in the 1500 calorie-a-day challenge?  Great!  I'm starving!  How about what I got in the mail?  Absolutely nothing!  What brought me the greatest joy of the day (besides the toothless obvious?)  Lunch!  Super!  
     I have a friend, actually, my husband has a friend, who has a wife, to whom I've had the "pleasure" of speaking on several occasions, who once said something I'll always remember and will share with you now:  She said, "I know the most important things in life are health and your your family, blah,blah, blah, but I have all that, and now I want the stuff!"  I mention this because I'm afraid of sounding like the spoiled brat that I am if I don't go on and on about the joyful moments of motherhood, and the satisfaction of a clean load of laundry and dinner on the table at six (as if.)  So, let me say now, that I do get great joy from my family, and you can trust that I know what is important in life, and now I just want to blather on about other... stuff.
     I was feeling sad and nostalgic when I wrote my last post, so I want to make it up to you by telling you a reunion story that doesn't make anyone look bad, except for me, and I think the fact that I am admitting and laughing at what happened totally cancels out my looking bad.  OK, so, at the reunion, I was making my way around the crowd of people I didn't remember or care about talking to, and I saw a female former classmate who could not have been more of a stranger to me, standing alone.  I was feeling a little at a loss for who to talk to, so I walked over and introduced myself and started talking to her.  She was nice enough, and she clearly had no idea who I was either, and by and by a male classmate came up and stood there with us.  It was really loud in the room so nobody could hear the huge hot fart I ripped, but I could totally smell it, and I'm sure my classmates could too.  I quickly wrapped up our meaningless conversation and walked away, totally giggling to myself that I had just smoked them out.  Come to think of it, she could have been waiting for him.  Maybe they were going to go make out!  Maybe this woman had been dreaming of this moment for twenty years!  She was finally going to make out with the guy she had a crush on in high school, and, to kick it off, she had to smell the fart of a perfect stranger (that would be me.)
     I don't actually think farts are that funny, and I don't like to have to smell my own let alone someone else's, but I do think stories about farts are funny, so there you go.  

1 comment:

Kelly said...

OMG, LOL!!!! Monica, that's so funny! You are brave to post that, wow! Evan has been taught by a boy we carpool with who is six months younger that singing "far" to replace every lyric in the songs playing on the ride to school is funny. Hey, at least they aren't actually doing the tooting to the rhythm! :-)