I forgot to tell you all how awesome I was recently! Leila lost a tooth. She's been losing them like crazy since we moved in to my parents house, and this is only a problem because she still believes in the tooth fairy. Her bed is crammed between my dad's desk and the wall, and there's no way to elegantly swipe the tooth and leave the cash without crawling under the desk like a dog, and even then, if the tooth isn't in a good place under the pillow, or the kid has wedged it between two pillows, you can't get to it anyway.
This was the case with the last tooth; I just couldn't get to it. Actually, now that I think about it, I think that was a different tooth. The tooth I'm speaking of, I actually forgot about. It happens sometimes; kid goes to bed, puts her tooth under her pillow, I say goodnight, and then I drink some wine, and watch some TV and go to bed and completely forget about the tooth. I have a lot on my mind, people!
So I got up in the morning as she was just waking up, and I hid the nine quarters in my hand. (tangent: The tooth fairy gives nine quarters because with the first tooth I meant to give $2 and I miscounted, so now I always have to count out nine quarters.) Leila went to turn on her lamp, and I said, "Don't turn it on yet! I want to snuggle!" and I crawled up on the bed and hugged her and while I was hugging her, slipped the quarters under the pillow. Step one complete, but I did not find the tooth.
Then Leila remembered that the tooth fairy should have been there so she lifted the top pillow to see if the tooth is gone. The light was still off, so we couldn't see the tooth, but I brushed my hand gently over the pillow, looking for it, felt it, and squeezed it between two fingers and said, "tooth is gone!"
Cargo delivered, payload retrieved, I told her to get her ass out of bed and get ready for school.
Actually I went back into my room where I stashed the tooth in the secret tooth collection receptacle where I keep all of her teeth, and did a little dance because I was so awesome.