Tuesday, December 29, 2009


I'm back, my lovelies, BACK! The holidays are over, or almost over. We still have to get through New Year's Eve and the New Year's day traditional packing up of the Christmas stuff in time for Leila's birthday on the 3rd. I'm always in a funk on December 31st. In fact, in the notes I write to myself every year, reminding myself not to buy any more wrapping paper and that I need new mulling spices, I have a note that says, "You will be in a bad mood on New Years Eve. Deal with it." I plan to vedge, and eat and read and hibernate until its time to go bowling.

We had a nice Christmas. I will do a post mortem on Holiday Season 2009 and decide what parts I love and what parts I don't so I can minimize some of the stress next year. I think those six dozen bicotti really set a bad tone for the rest of the month. I feel like I spent the whole month in the kitchen, and we still don't have anything to eat. All we have in this house is m&ms and Trader Joes peppermint cookies. Even I can't live off that. And what a mess, huh? I cannot believe the clean up from Christmas day; the boxes, the paper, the packaging, the receipts the food the returns, blah blah etc. etc.

Last year, I told you that my family always exchanges meat products, for reasons passing understanding. This year, the only meat that was given was a can of fish from my dad to me. I gave it back to him, but kept the Safeway gift card that was taped to it. Rob gave my dad a jar of white asparagus, but that doesn't count as a meat product. I also told you last year that my mom is so stingy with the See's candies, so this year I ignored her protests, and told her that a) nobody likes these leftover cookies she puts out for dessert, and b) I ate saurbraten whithout complaining and I deserved some goddam bridge mix. I ripped open the package and ate them while looking into her pleading face. How can someone who is usually so generous be so stingy with candy? I don't understand it. She had kind of a sour puss on all evening. I don't know what her problem was. Maybe next time I'll bring my own bridge mix and write the gift tag out to myself. That way she can still regift hers. She also gave Leila a 30 year old travel alarm clock; you know, one of those old things that folds down into a little box? Leila was over the moon. You would have though she got Rock Band for the Wii.

The hamster is still alive. She has a new ball, but there's no space in Leila's room too roll around what with all her new crap from Santa. Her bedding is starting to stink a little, but its cool, we can hang with a stinky hamster. I tell you: if I had a bigger house, I would totally get a hamster. Even though I have sworn that I will never acquire another animal, I think a hamster is a really great pet. Yes, they are a little stinky, and you have to clean their cages, and some of them bite, but you don't have to walk them or bathe them or pay $70 every 10 weeks to have them groomed. They don't sleep with you and hog the covers and shed on your pillow, they don't get in fights with other neighborhood hamsters, and it doesn't matter if your kid is bored with them, hamsters don't care. They are perfectly happy to sleep all day and run on a wheel. AND! They only live, like, a year and a half, unlike the seemingly endless lives of my cats. You can still snuggle them, and pet them, but then you can get on with your life and you don't have to trick them by throwing a treat into the kitchen so that you can get out the front door unmolested. You don't have to take them camping, because they are fine being left alone for a few days. All in all, the perfect pet.

I mentioned Wii Rock Band, so I will leave you with this video of Leila singing a Beatles song. If I don't write again before New Year's, Happy New Year, and if you're in a funk, just deal with it.


lama said...

Yay Leila! Bring her over here so she and I can sing the harmonies with 2 microphones! (I even have a 3rd if you want to join in.)

Alice said...

She's got some moves already!