Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Eau de Bacon

Today was a better day.  Regardless of what is happening in the world, the people I live with demand that there is food to eat in the house, and that they have clean underwear, and that things are "picked up" around here.  They also insist that I must wash the sheets that the cat puked on a week ago.  Fine, whatever.

Today I made bacon jam.  Yes, it was bacon jam day.  Its like jam, only its bacon, see?  You use it like jam, only on things that taste good with bacon.  Like everything.  Tomorrow, Leila will be taking a bacon jam and peanut butter sandwich to school.  She's no moron.

It was hard to continue to feel entirely blue while the house smelled like bacon for hours.  Its was also hard to feel entirely blue when Corn Pops AND Double Stuff Oreos were ON SALE at the supermarket.  Its like the universe wants me to smile and get fat.  I bet those oreos would taste awesome with a little bacon jam on them.  I'm not going to find out.  I have limits.  (Why does the spellchecker think oreos is spelled wrong?  Don't you think "oreos" should be in the dictionary by now?)

Tomorrow I have to clean the house, and I'm going to Whole Foods to by two teaspoons of tumeric and ground coriander from the bulk spice bin.  I tried to buy them in the supermarket today, but the only ground coriander was in a large jar and that just chaps my hide.  I don't need 6 tablespoons of ground coriander that will sit in my spice drawer until I die, I just need half a teaspoon.   I would even have settled for one of those little jars, just to save myself the trip to Whole Foods tomorrow, but noOOOooo.  I'm making Chicken Korma.  Its Indian.  I think.  The recipe also calls for a cinnamon stick, but screw that.   Watch the bulk spices cost more than it I had bough the big jars and just thrown out the rest.

Christmas is in a week.  I should be panicking by now.  I'm not.  Something's wrong...


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