Friday, November 4, 2011


In the process of doing laundry, I pulled the knob on the washer that starts the water flowing, and the knob came off in my hand. A little, black plastic piece came off with it, and that was, apparently, the lynch pin that was holding the whole operation together. The washer still works, but the knob is fucked.

This sounds like an annoying little inconvenience, and it would be just that to the normal person. However, that is not how this will go down.

In spite of the fact that the washer is 100 years old, it will be all my fault that the knob broke because I am a slob and a barbarian, and I don't know how to take care of things. This will be added to the long list of my transgressions and character flaws: I broke the washing machine. My mom has treated it right for the last 25 years and it hasn't given her an ounce of trouble, but the minute I got my hands on it, I broke it. She will, again, win at the game of who takes better care of their stuff so it lasts forever. Its really a wonder I have kept my pets alive for as long as I have.

Nevermind that if she had been the one doing laundry the same thing would have happened to her. If that had been the case, it still would have been my fault because I must have pulled too hard on the knob the last time I did laundry. She never had these kinds of problems before I moved in with my family and all their dirty undies.

I used her vacuum this morning. Its a really good thing I didn't break that, too...

1 comment:

Joan Crawford said...

I'm a laundry hoarder and I always wait until Sunday night to get it all done - my nightmare is to have the washer malfunction that night and leave me with nothing to put the kids in for school:

"Hello, I'm calling to say my son won't be in today."
"Oh, no! Is he sick?"
"Oh, no... I just have no clean clothing to put him in... that's a normal thing to keep a kid home for, right? I'm sure you get like 3 calls a week for that."